I just broke up with my long term gf a few days ago and even though I know it was the right thing to do I'm still feeling so lonely and guilty and unwanted. Things weren't working and neither of us were getting what we needed but my life feels so much emptier right now. I want to talk to her and go get coffee and cry it out but that's probably the last thing either of us needs right now.
None of my old friends seem to even care anymore. I texted a few of them today to try and hang out and nobody even responded. I called my best friend on the verge of crying but she was busy and I just feel like a burden on everyone.
I hate living at home with my parents. I'm tired of the guilt tripping and
emotional abuse my mom throws my way constantly for not being a good little Mormon boy. I'm tired of feeling like I have no support from anyone irl. I'm so needy and I want constant validation from the people I care about that I'm a good person and that they like me. I worry that anywhere I end up I'm going to wear out my welcome.
I never thought I'd miss working 10 hours a day so much but at least when I was sitting at a desk behind a computer screen I had something to occupy my mind other than my anxieties and insecurities.
Sorry for the long rambly post I just feel like if I don't get this out I'm gonna break down.